some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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