ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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