I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
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She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
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I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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