Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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