the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Randomize