Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize