I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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