i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize