So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Send help, water and tortillas.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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