i just had sex bonerless
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Randomize