Fuck appropriateness.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize