dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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I need you to use more vowels.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize