I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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