pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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