i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize