Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
hell yes lets make some ravioli
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize