Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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