He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize