It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize