you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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