i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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