After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize