singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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