okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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