I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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