I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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