I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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