I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
its liver damage thursday
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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