He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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