trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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