I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
and you fell through a lawn chair
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
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