So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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