everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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