I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
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Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
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We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize