did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Two words: blizzard sex
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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