I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
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Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
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My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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