I'm lost and stupid without you.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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