I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize