around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
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We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
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Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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