i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MIDGETS
????
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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