and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize