I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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