So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
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I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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