4 words: hood of his car
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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