so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
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his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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