I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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