Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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