She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I know her cup size but not her name....
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