4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize