Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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